When you meet your destiny, everything turns away from the legs. After all, you are not used to the fact that he is so quickly answering your messages, and so carefully listening when you say. You will even be surprised by trifles: when he opens the door in front of you or drives you before a date.
You are not used to that someone looks in your eyes so deeply and admits that he feels. You are not used to that someone can be such a straightforward, and not incomprehensible, in vain she causing your time.
And although you feel from the very beginning that he is another, just in case you still carefully be careful. You have already hurt earlier, and you do not want to repeat the mistakes of the past. Because you are not in a hurry. You act with caution.
And he does not mind. He is not against what you need a few weeks before you open it. What do you need for a few months before you can lie to him into bed. What do you need for several years to accept that he is your fate.
Unlike all the rest of your guys, he never makes you doubt or worry. He never even frowns when another guy, your friend, talks to you. He never complains that you have too short dress, and does not accuse you in treason. He never forces you to engage in Sax, when you are not in the mood.
He treats you correctly. He treats you the way you deserve.
His behavior refines, but at the same time scares, because it is completely different. You're used to wait for hours to answer your message and keep emotions in yourself. You are accustomed to the rules of modern relationship.
But he destroys all these rules, and you do not know how to react. Should you confess to him in their feelings? Should I immediately answer his message? Be a real one?
With him, you are as if for the first time in a relationship. For the first time you open yourself to someone. For the first time, you really trust someone. For the first time, you honestly believe that you can spend a whole life with someone.
When you meet your destiny after a relationship with a dozen assholes, you start tightly to keep it. Because you know how difficult it is to find a good guy. You know how lucky you are in a relationship with the love of your life.
You do not want to spoil anything. You do not want to lose the best thing happened to you. Therefore, you try our best, make every effort - and the most insane thing that he does the same. He gives you the same amount as he gets. He behaves on an equal footing.
When you meet your destiny, you finally understand what it means to be beloved. You finally feel love as it should be.
And this is why you do not doubt the droplets, which should be with this person.
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- I am 30, I am the publishing pub. I drive to work on the subway. Externally huge such Bugai. Once at the exit from the car, I saw that one girl with a backpack could not push on their own. I decided to help her: I took a hood and came out with her. The next morning, I look, looking for me with my eyes in the car - so we are 2 months old and went, I helped her go.
She gave me to listen to her music and generally behaved cute and modestly, I even began to regret that she was only 15 years old. But in one day it turned out that she did not go to school, as I thought, and to work in the Office of Social Policy And she was 25. It turned out that I took 2 months from the subway for a hood of an official. And it would be the most epic failure for 30 years, if she had not agreed to go with me in a cafe.
- What I found out! When was in the 4th grade, in front of the summer holidays we gave flowers to teachers, and I had a huge expensive bouquet. It was necessary to congratulate the teachers, but ... they were cruel and unfair! And I presented the one who truly deserved, - a cleaner. But the next year we did not see her. And after 9 years later, a friend said that she was his neighbor and then she left the school from happiness and opened her job. He says that I pretended to her hope.
- "Suddenly fate? And I am not extractable. "- I always told myself. So far I have not broken the leg in two places, falling in the bathroom. I went to the traumapunk with the unfolded foot, half a brine on the nails, in a grandmother's sweater and without a hint of makeup. I met my fate there - a guy with a broken hand and the bladled half a beard. Together for 5 years.
- Once at night I heard something fell in the corridor. It turned out the book. She fell off the shelf and opened on the page with the heading "how to lose weight." Thought.
- Once it went to the club with a friend, I sit at the bar with a bar, comes to me a guy and says: "We went to me, I will show you your raccoon." No, of course, I was glued, but for the first time. It became interesting, went. We come, he opens the door, and a real raccoon will run away to meet him! In general, several months already live together: i, boyfriend and raccoon Garik.
- I drove on the bus on the exam and suddenly hear inside myself: "Saw at this stop, go to the cafe, make a bridge." I think for nonsense, I have an exam! The bus stops, I feel something inside, and I go out. I go to the cafe, I do a bridge and hear how a man shouts something like me. I rhed, and a man for me! Caught up and asks why the bridge did in the cafe. And I say that I do not know myself. He almost sharpened. A month ago, his family died in a car accident. He could not accept and decided to suicide. Dinted and thought: "God, if you are and I have to live further, give me a sign." And then I am.
- I really liked one guy in the university, so I liked that I constantly imagined how we meet him and how then we live happily and happily. I made it before I confused reality with dreams - after the holidays, thinking about my own, came to him and kissed with words: "I missed it so much!" For a little bit like a guy realized that I was a fool. Apologized, ran away. He caught up with me, said he did not understand what it was now, but he did not mind to continue.
- I am 35. At work I am the boss, in life - hermit. I have no friends, but there is one unchanged habit: I go to the same pub, I sit at the very end of the bar and just drink "Guinness".
In one of the usual evenings in a pub, someone unexpectedly closed my eyes with his hands and asked: "Guess who?" The girl in the back understood that he was mistaken and, apologizing, went to the other end of the bar. She was so young, easy, with eyes like two big black beads - not like that. I could no longer think, and "Guinness" suddenly became some bitter.
She waited for someone all this time, but, apparently, in vain. How crazy began to invent, how to talk with her, but nothing came to mind. The bar closed, she was put up. I ran out and because of the terrible weather and her saddeen suggested to throw it to the house.
In the car she chatted without a silence - it was so much life! I forgot to ask her number, came the night only at home. Came to the pub in a week, and there she. Sits in my place. I closed her eyes with my hands and asked: "Guess who?" She walked and shouted: "I thought you would never appear here!"
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01.01.2020
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Routine does not give you peace? Every day looks like the previous one? Favorite hobby does not bring you former joy, and it is more profitable to sell you the authorities to the authorities than to endure an unmotivated employee? You are on the way to gray and boring life to gray hair. Time to change! Take a handle, open the diary and write an action plan.
Week One. All that surrounds you.
There is surely a front camera in your trimmed gadget, so turn it on and look attentively on the screen - you will have to say goodbye to all this. And do not forget that in addition to your tired face on the screen there is no less dull background - the situation that surrounds you. Therefore, for a better effect, sit down on a spinning chair and, with a phone in your hands, turning out of all my might. It is already fun, and the dull interior of your burgoot is time to change. So, the first entry in the diary: urgently appoint a meeting with the designer.
Do not be afraid to change your apartments to be unrecognizable. Order Artificial oak with swings or throw your bed and buy a water mattress. The designer will help embody all your most insane fantasies into reality. Do not regret money, this is an investment in the "new" you.
WEEK TWO. Appearance.
No, we were not mistaken, leaving, it would seem, the obvious point on the second week. Imagine such a picture: exhausted by the usuality, you run into the first hairdresser, and ask to choke the name of your favorite dog on my backbone. The catch is that, not prepared morally to radical changes, you will feel the jester and expect ridicule from others. All this will play a better role in your desire to change life. Now you will have time to get used and realize that the process is launched, and there is no road. Your house resembles fireworks on the monophonic sky, which means it is time to change and image: Meet clothes.
There's actually everything is simple: never wore beards - let go, the beard is currently in the trend. You walk with brutal bristles - do not be afraid to demonstrate your rosy cheeks. All my life went in a tie - Rather, running to the store and pretend fashionable jeans with hooligan english boots. Get used to attention from the opposite sex, they like bright. The main thing is not to be afraid to experiment, clothing can always be thrown out, and the hair will grow.
Week three. Friends and work.
After your personal space and appearance passed through the originality filters, it is time to understand the work and in people around you. Do not burn bridges: Take the best friends on board, if they also want to change life. And if not, then look for new ones. Now you yourself at your own request you read our instructions, in other words: you, to put it mildly, something unhappy. Turn the page and write: New Life - New people.
It is important here to understand that in addition to friends you are surrounded and annoying colleagues for work, and the bosses, proving the existence of hell, and inadequate, always displeased customers. In the aggregate it is serious strength, so look at people who play at least some role in your life. If they pull you down - feel free to say goodbye to them. There are no indispensable people, a new one comes to replace the old one. The same applies to work. Do not be afraid to take and leave from the boning place, do a completely new business. Pictures that are dusting on the upper shelf may be value not only for you. Remember, you are much versatile than you think.
Week Four. Free time and personal life.
Last week - congratulations! You are almost a new personality. It remains to deal with your free time and companion of life. Finishing record in your diary: hobbies and love-carrot.
Do not limit yourself in anything, try a new one: you can make a dog yourself and decorate it under the tiger, make a carvings on watermelon or build a hammock on Elbrus's slope. Put on Flight Flight! The main thing is that the new lesson gives you pleasure.
If you have a girl three weeks ago, and she suffered all your tricks, then we have nothing more to add, just don't let her be bored. If there is no one, then you are ready to appear alpha male on the field of love playing. No need to pick up a soul mate according to the same features as before. It is not enough for you! Compass on the female of a higher level! Do not know where? Go to five minute dates, go down in the subway, go to the cafe, to the store, cinema, on a fashionable party or museum. The habitat of beautiful women is very wide.
Whether be yourself new. Now you are not you.
P.S. If the instruction has not worked, there is always a proven option: around the world hitchhiking. I think that this will definite your life.
Some insights that will turn your world to head on the head, as did it with me.
For the past years, I learned a few dozen of small tricks and tricks that could make life at least a little, but better. Well, together they were able to make life really better - not even "a little". But those things that were able to change my life really, were a consequence of several insights that turned my world from legs on the head and forever changed my reality.
Now it seems to me that the world in which I live is not at all such as ten years ago, when I just started wondering the mechanics of quality of life. But in fact, not the world or inhabiting his people changed at all - the way I look at all this and how I think about it.
It is very possible that you have already experienced some of these insights. Well, if not - then you are close to them.
1. You are not your thoughts
When I first read it in some book, I didn't like it at all. Who am I so, if not my thoughts? I considered to go without saying that the mental monologue in my head was "me" with whom all events in my life took place.
Now I clearly see that my life is a series of events experienced by me and impressions, and my thoughts are just another impression. Thoughts are not substantial smell, light or sound. As well as all, they arise in my mind, they are easily distinguished from other impressions, and they sooner or later disappear, freeing the place for something else.
And since you are able to watch your own thoughts with the same ease, which for other objects, who does this observation? Do not try to answer this question too quickly. This question, as well as the answer to it, are the cornerstone of all great religions and spiritual traditions.
2. Life reveals itself only in the smallest moments
Of course, it is! Once I called this fact the best of everything I had the opportunity to learn. No one never experienced anything that was not part of the moment in which you are right now. Before I understood it, I was constantly trying to correct all my life in one felling, fighting with problems that, in general, did not even exist. We can all find determination to deal with any problem that meets us at the same moment in which we live ... While we remember that this very moment is the only point in which we really come into contact with life. And this is the only thing we can really make useful. No one can manage with the past or future, for it also exists only in our thoughts - it is possible to waste all your strength on these ghosts.
3. How good is your life is determined not to what moments are embodied, and which are not, but how do you cope with those that are embodied
Now I consider this truth to rule how to achieve happiness for all 101%. I think, yes ... But sometimes it seems to me that it will be easier to achieve the desired, I still overcome the thirst for controlling everything around. But in fact, a wise person is not distinguished by the fact that he controls everything around, but the fact that he is willing to try to cope with any people encountered in the life path - even if he doesn't really like it. Imagine that you beat the wheel, got sick when you need to finish an important project, or simply stumbled on something and broke it - and they were not upset because of this. If you are ready to cope with everything you are ready to throw fate in your side - what are you afraid of? From such situations you have only one way out - make your life better. And how to know, perhaps coping with pleasant and unpleasant circumstances as they appear, one day you will find how strong power over them is that you will seek the desired much more often and faster. In the song "Modest Mouse" there is a wonderful line, ideally suitable for similar situations: the longer life, the weaker the horror.
4. Most of the life imaginary
Human beings are extremely inclined to leave the head in their own thoughts and imagination. We are so inclined to this that often we lose sight of that simple fact that we are almost always thinking about something. Most of what we interact with is not the material world at all, but our ideas about him, expectations of something from him, as well as personal interests in it. We are very difficult to perceive something directly, not at the same time with the thoughts about this "something", and therefore most of what we perceive are imaginary things. As Mark Twain said, "I survived many terrible things for my life, and some of them really happened to me." And how to handle it? The best option that managed to find me - think more realistic.
5. All human history - pain and suffering, so it is not surprising that we suffer better than any other living beings
Oh. Not really a pleasant discovery. Although ... when I used to suffer from suffering, it seemed to me that this was due to the fact that something was wrong with me - that I would not live wrong. But this is not at all. Suffering is part of human nature, and this is quite normal. Moreover, their existence has a very good reason. The constant background hum of life, folding into the words "there is something wrong here, it is necessary to improve it" in combination with periodic outbreaks of fear and adrenaline lifting. Here are already millions of years contribute to the survival of the human race. This thirst for change, thirst to break out of the captivity of the swamps of us under the basis of almost all of our behavior. This is a simple and ruthless survival mechanism, perfectly coping with the preservation of our life, but he has an unpleasant side effect: he lays suffering in the very basis of human nature. After I understood it, I began to realize that the roots of almost all life problems lie in the human itself. Yes, perhaps it really sounds too gloomy, but in reality it dismisses it. Why? Yes, because: 1) We begin to understand that what we suffer does not mean that with our life something is wrong, 2) In the end, it is precisely to decide whether to suffer whether to us, and if so, then As much, and 3) most of the problems are caused by the same thing - and they can be solved, in essence, equally.
6. Emotions exist to make us biased
This discovery turned my idea of \u200b\u200bemotions from heads. I used to consider emotions with reliable indicators of my life - if you please, in the right direction I go. But this is not at all. Your fleeting emotions are not at all suitable to evaluate your dignity, and even though you do wrong correctly, but they are greatly coping with an indication that you can't let go. The problem of emotions is that they often make us at the same time more biased and more energetic. Another survival mechanism with unforeseen side effects.
7. All people, in essence, wish one - to achieve the desired and avoid suffering
Knowing it, we begin to understand why sometimes people with such ease cause each other suffering. Previously, trying to explain it, I invariably came to the conclusion that they are just bad. But it was the usual excuse. No matter how other people behave, in fact they are just trying with the maximum efficiency on which they are only able (at this point) to achieve the fulfillment of their dreams or weaken their suffering. And these are the motives that we all understand perfectly well: the only thing that is different is the methods, and those methods that are at the disposal of each of us depend on our upbringing and experienced life experience, as well as this seemingly little things like mood. Some of these methods are smart, elegant and go to the benefit of others, others are bad, poorly thought out and destroyfully act on you and on others. And you know what? Most of the destructive behavior is unconscious. So do not be deceived - there is no good and evil, unless smart and stupid behavior. And realizing it, you absolutely change your gaze on morality and justice.
8. What you believe in something, is not a reason to be proud of it
Faith in something - not at all achievement. I grew up, considering that the inviolability of my faith in something you can be proud of, but once I realized that faith was just an opinion or a set of opinions that I simply refuse to even discuss. Trust very simple. And the stronger your faith, the more you are closed for personal growth and wisdom - because the "power of faith" in fact turns out to be just stubbornness with which you refuse to doubt what you believe. And as soon as you begin to be proud of your faith, as soon as you start thinking that she makes you better, it becomes part of your ego. Listen to the speech of a fallen conservative or liberal speaking about what he believes and you will understand - whatever you tell them about what they believe, they never will hear you - if only you are not Believe in the same as they. It is very nice - talking with the power of conviction, and even more pleasant - when the interlocutor agrees with you, and sincerely believers are hopelessly dependent on this drug, instinctively searching society of themselves like this. The mind captured by faith becomes like a closed door. So if you believe, then just what you will definitely do not regret, and not be afraid to lose this faith.
9. Objectivity subjective
Life is a subjective experience that cannot be avoided. Each life experience I get, passes through the prism of this personal and inseparable experience. The fact that I feel personally, I can not share with anyone, no one can appreciate it - except, again, me. Naturally, it affects my life itself - and how else? The strongest factor is influenced, perhaps, what I have to trust my personal experience, as no one can look at the world from my point of view - no one except me. Well, even this knowledge makes me even more admire the world around me - now I know that any "objective" perception of the world in fact, from beginning to end, only me was created. And this is a perception based on the books read by me, which met by me and accumulated by me experience. It means that the perception of my world is absolutely unique that my world will never be the same as someone else, and therefore it is impossible to allow third-party observers to decide for me who I am and what should be my life. Subjective perception of life - and there is life, and objectivity each of us only builds on this foundation, trying to make it more material. And sometimes the awareness of this truth can completely change the role of science and religion in the life of those who grab it.
